U.S. GOVERNMENT AGENCY SAYS MERMAIDS DO NOT EXIST

[Geee]

Human Events:

 

Mermaids do not exist, according to the federal government’s scientific agency that oversees the seas.

“Mermaids — those half-human, half-fish sirens of the sea — are legendary sea creatures chronicled in maritime cultures since time immemorial,” says the National Ocean Service, a division of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA).

“But are mermaids real? No evidence of aquatic humanoids has ever been found,” the federal agency says on its website.

The statement by the federal government follows on the heels of a mock-u-mentary that aired on the Animal Planet channel, in which an actor portraying a NOAA scientist suggested that the government was conducting serious studies on the existence of merfolk.

What they didn’t point out well enough was the fact that the program was for entertainment value only, a source familiar with the hullabaloo told Human Events.

“Apparently, NOAA has been receiving calls from all sides on this, some who are irate that the federal government is spending money on this kind of research, and others who are irate that the federal government is conspiring to keep the truth a secret,” the source said.

[RandyM]

If someone did some digging, I bet they'd find NOAA has been wasting taxpayer dollars doing stuff just as stupid (or more so) as studies on the existence of mermaids.

[pollyannaish]

Thank goodness they've been taking care of this. Makes my taxes worth paying.

 

[RidesAPaleHorse]

Next thing ya know they'll be tellin' us there's no Santa Claus or Easter Bunny.

 

Or that a tax is a penaly.

[Valin]

No such thing as Mermaids? Explain this