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Today's Toons 11/22/21


pookie18

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & W: 

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In Case You Missed It Dept.:  


President Biden denied responsibility for the high cost of consumer goods last week. He blamed it on OPEC, shipping logjams and trucker shortages. Last week the Consumer Price Index factored in the average price of gas and groceries and confirmed that inflation is now higher than Snoop Dogg.  


House Democrats sent the Infrastructure Bill to the White House for Biden's signing. For months they vowed to kill it unless a proposed socialist spending bill was passed in the Senate. Congress is so full of brain-dead people that necrophiliacs look upon C-SPAN as their favorite porn channel.  


Aviation Weekly said vaccine-refusal layoffs coud cause airlines to face revenue losses that must be made up. Don't miss the new pre-flight announcement that the flight attendants will be giving. In case of loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will drop down in front of you for five dollars.  


The New York Post reports the British public is still talking about President Biden’s visit with the Royals in Scotland last week. While Joe Biden was chatting with the Duchess Camilla, he broke wind long and loudly. It was the first time gas has been under three dollars since he became president.  


President Biden and Kamala Harris slumped to an all-time low approval rating in a new USA Today poll. But to be fair, I’d like to point out the civics lesson they’ve taught every young person. If nothing else, Biden and Harris have proved it’s still possible to sleep your way to the top in America.  


Los Angeles city workers by the thousands filled Grant Park to protest the federal mandate that all employees be vaccinated in order to work. The protestors are all good Democrats. They’re just glad it’s Biden and not the fascist Trump who’s forcing them to get the vaccine shot or lose their jobs.  


The New York Jets home stadium crowd last week became the first NFL football fans to break into the loud vulgar crowd chant that slams President Biden. The great Democratic presidents are identifiable by their initials. First we had FDR, and then JFK and then LBJ, and today we have FJB.  


The U.S. posted a five million dollar reward for drug cartel kingpin Aureliano Guzman. He's the brother of El Chapo. The Justice Department wants the Mexican coke dealer to pay President Biden four hundred and fifty thousand dollars for separating him from his child when Trump was president.  


Secretary of Energy Jennifer Granholm told reporters she has no idea when the price of fuel might come down. The government isn't standing still. The IRS allowed that this year you can either have your refund check mailed to you or simply have it deposited directly into your gas station.  


Barack Obama spoke at the Climate Summit in Glasgow and warned small island nations that they are the canaries in the coal mine of climate change. He just broke ground in Chicago at his library. It's dedicated to the life and accomplishments of Barack Obama, otherwise known as MSNBC.  


Special Counsel John Durham has indicted Hillary 2016 campaign PR aides for lying to the FBI to set up the Russia collusion hoax to divert attention from her email scandal. She's a good sport about it. Hillary Clinton just bought John Durham a front row ticket to the next Travis Scott concert.  


Congress returns to work this week with a debate over the Biden Administration’s tax plan at hand. The proposal hits high income earners pretty hard. Under the Biden plan, the government takes forty percent of what you make and the other sixty percent, of course, is taken by the gas station.  


Netflix implemented new workplace safeguards banning employees from staring at each other longer than five seconds as a sexual harassment. They call it the five-second rule. In the long march for progress women have finally achieved the same rights as a sandwich you just dropped on the floor.  


President Biden launched his push to get everyone a Covid shot by going on PBS to thank Big Bird for getting vaccinated. Joe forgets the Muppets have a real independent streak. Later that morning they opened Sesame Street by announcing today’s show is brought to you by the letters FJB.  


- - Argus Hamilton  


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(Thank you, Mistysea)

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37 minutes ago, mass55th said:

Thanks for the Toons Pookie!! Have a great week!!

You're welcome, as always & the same to you, mass55th!

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