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Today's Toons 9/16/19


pookie18

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & L:
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In Case You Missed It Dept.:

Bernie Sanders campaigned in New England in trying to recapture his magic touch with young voters. They are nothing if not loyal to the old socialist. Millennials in Bernie Sanders shirts are proof that some kids never grow out of wanting to wear clothes with dinosaurs on them.

Manhattan's federal court was the scene of one dozen women accusers of Jeffrey Epstein who claimed he robbed them of their innocence. That's not all. Another accuser told the court that twenty years ago she was sexually assaulted by whoever Trump nominates to succeed Ruth Bader Ginsberg.

Democratic Socialist presidential candidate Bernie Sanders introduced his own version of the Green New Deal hoping to co-opt the environmental zeal of Millennials. Bernie said he sees an America with no cars and no airplanes. We should elect him president of Gilligan's Island.

Joe Biden worked his special goofy spell on a New Hampshire crowd. Joe had the audience looking cross-eyed when he asked them to think about what it would be like if Barack Obama had been assassinated when he first ran for president. In fact it's all Hillary ever thinks about.

The FBI just issued a Silver Alert for the New England region and quite possibly for Iowa. It seems there's an old man wandering around New Hampshire, thinking he's in Vermont, claiming he's not nuts and handing out Silver Stars. If you find him, please return him to the Biden campaign.

The Federal Bureau of Prisons is expecting to be under congressional probe in September for its lax protection of Jeffrey Epstein, whose death was ruled a suicide. In addition, Bobby Kennedy's assassin Sirhan Sirhan just survived a knife attack in prison. Who knew that HE had dirt on Hillary?

Facebook may remove Likes from your under FB posts so no one will know how popular your post was. There'd be no visible reward for posting something funny, beautiful or interesting, all posts will be equal. It's like giving Hillary Clinton a participation trophy, so she can say she won something.

WalMart responded to outrage over mass shootings and said they will no longer sell handguns or short-barreled rifles. In addition, WalMart stepped up store security in an anti-gun-environment friendly way. They have replaced all the armed guards with someone old and expendable.

The Los Angeles Times reported rising concerns among seismologists that L.A. may be due for a large earthquake. Adding to L.A.'s earthquake fears, a previously hidden line of geological cracks underneath Los Angeles was just discovered. CNN quickly named it Trump's Fault.

Christine Blasey Ford's attorney admitted the attack on Brett Kavanaugh at his confirmation was a political hit job. The intense probe of his behavior in school was insane. At one point in the hearings, CNN broke the story that Brett once went swimming twenty-five minutes after eating lunch.

-- Argus Hamilton

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‘Democrat donkey head in the sand’, ‘give me liberty or give me free stuff (not), & ‘Don Quixote/ Pancho Sanchez aka Waters/Nadler’ were good ones- thanks, Pookie!

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3 hours ago, Hauntess said:

‘Democrat donkey head in the sand’, ‘give me liberty or give me free stuff (not), & ‘Don Quixote/ Pancho Sanchez aka Waters/Nadler’ were good ones- thanks, Pookie!

My pleasure, as ever, Hauntess!

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