pookie18

Today's Toons 4/16/18

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Mark "Mumy" Zuckerburg:

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letter C:

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In Case You Missed It Dept.:

 

PETA activist Nasim Aghdam was ID'ed as the YouTube headquarters shooter, giving PETA more members who are mass shooters than the NRA. It gets worse. Cops say their YouTube shooting investigation was hindered by having to sit through a five-second ad before interviewing each witness.

 

President Trump signed a proclamation Tuesday dispatching the National Guard to the border between the U.S. and Mexico to halt illegal immigration. The opposition is fierce. Just to anger President Trump, the Democrats are going to start ordering their illegal immigrants through Amazon.

 

The White Privilege Conference held for college students got underway at Western Michigan in Grand Rapids University. It's a seminar just for white students to teach them to be aware of their unfair advantage in life. Leave it to liberals to bring back segregation with the best of intentions.

 

Chappaquiddick opens in theaters tonight about Teddy Kennedy's tragic car crash. Teddy was a party animal, Bobby was Joe McCarthy's hatchet man, Jack was a serial womanizer, and Papa Joe was a Nazi appeaser. But when the media's on your side, the Kennedy Honors is a white-tie event.

 

San Francisco police report that the YouTube parking lot mass shooter Nasim Aghdam went to a local firing range for target practice before her rampage. However, she fired twenty rounds, wounded four people and only managed to kill herself. Is there any wonder there's a gender pay gap?

 

Jeff Sessions named a U.S. attorney to be in charge of providing Congress Justice Department documents about the probe of Hillary Clinton using a private e-mail server for U.S. business. This news won't cheer her up at all. Hillary always looks like you just told her you wrecked her Mercedes.

 

The New York Fire Department rushed to the Trump Tower in Manhattan Saturday to put out a fire on the fiftieth floor. Damage was extensive. No one can prove what caused the fire, but the fire marshal has asked Hillary Clinton to stop standing on Fifth Avenue and staring at Trump Tower.

 

CBS is battling an upcoming Washington Post story detailing Charlie Rose's sex misconduct while hosting CBS This Morning and CBS 60 Minutes. Execs are terrified. CBS warned employees that they expect all non-disclosure agreements to be obeyed, except the one signed by Stormy Daniels.

 

President Trump's lawyer Michael Cohen says he paid porn star Stormy Daniels hush money to protect Trump before the election. He underestimated the foe. Democrats used Deep Throat to bring down Richard Nixon and now they're using the star of Trailer Trash Nurses to go after Trump.

 

China's President Xi gave in to pressure from Trump Tuesday and agreed to open up China's market to U.S. products and cut tariffs on U.S. cars and respect intellectual property rights. However no sky is without a few clouds. The Mueller probe just expanded to Trump tearing the tags off mattresses.

 

Harvard Law School professor Alan Dershowitz told Sean Hannity Monday he thinks Robert Mueller's FBI raid on Trump's private lawyer's office was a breach of attorney-client privilege. Both sides have taken off the gloves now. If Trump were Catholic, Mueller would arrest his confessor.

 

London's Mayor Saddiq Khan sent three hundred extra police into the streets Sunday to crack down and arrest anyone who's carrying a knife. Knife attacks have been rampant in immigrant neighborhoods. It proves if you don't control your borders, you end up having to control your cutlery.

 

-- Argus Hamilton

 

According to reports, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg sat on a four-inch-thick cushion to boost his height during his Senate testimony yesterday. Zuckerberg was like, "Oh, no, that's my wallet."

 

-- Seth Meyers

 

 

 

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(Thank you, Mistysea)

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Happy Monday Pookie!! Thanks for the Toons, and have a great week!!

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4 minutes ago, mass55th said:

Happy Monday Pookie!! Thanks for the Toons, and have a great week!!

You're welcome & the same to you, mass55th!

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